When i was a kid, i promise myself that i will never get married at all. Why? Because of 'bapak'. A person whom i was and still am terrified off. Yes, all fathers are strict, i get it.
The only happy memory that i had with him, was when i was still in kindergarten, he would take me to the playground near our house and after school, he will carry me on his shoulders. That's it.
I may sound very ungrateful (or maybe i am). But it hurts. When every single day, you just get shouted at, blamed at for the most ridiculous things. For the very minute things that happen.
Yes, i am very blessed that at least i have a place to live. But the mental torture every single day, i just can't.
You know what's worst? When he treats guests so nicely and loving. Then when it comes to his own children, its like we are trash in his eyes.
I wish i could find comfort in someone at home. But no. Even mak gave up on his attitude. Then, what about me?
Despite all that, i do love him. I do. But i hate the way he treats me most of the time. Maybe i'm not a good daughter. Maybe.
