Dear self, you cannot depend on others for happiness. You have to be happy in your own shoes. Do what you love to do. Nothing else matters because your happiness lies in your own hands.
Be grateful for the little things. Be nice to others. Give. Give. Give. Give as much as you can to people. Say nice words. Have positive thoughts.
You can overcome this. This is just another period that you have to deal with. Same like every other year. Stay strong.
Better days are coming.
Most of the time, I really just need to punch the walls and hurt my knuckles to let go of the emotions inside me.
Sometimes, I just need a hug and someone to tell me that everything will get better soon.
Sometimes, I just need to cry to sleep, hoping that i'll forget everything the next day.
Sometimes, I'll just stay in bed and wait till the next day to arrive.
Sometimes, I do feel like there's no point in living anymore.
I wish I was born with no feelings. Cause I can't trust anyone with my feelings. No one.
I feel that I should put in more effort in making myself happy. It's just so tiring to please others. And I can never depend on others to make myself happy.
I really want to dig deep and bury myself in a hole. Or at least hide myself under the blanket till i'm ready to face another vicious cycle.
Truth is, I can easily make lots of friends but i can never make a friendship last. Because i give a piece of myself to everyone and it doesn't seem like alot. And I lose myself each time.
